Dear insecure woman,
Just look at my foot! It’s a source of insecurity for me, because I just have odd feet. I’ll look around at the beautifully polished and smooth toenails of friends, and I feel self-conscious. I am so grateful for my feet and being able to walk, as many people have no feet or cannot walk. Still, I am insecure about my tootsies; and after writing this blog, I vow to start showing them some love!
Oh, and the insecurities we harbor deep inside of us. Sometimes they are obvious in our words and actions, but often we conceal them pretty well behind our beautiful smiling and confident looking masks (and sleek toenails!).
I’ll tell you a secret, which isn’t a secret now that I am sharing it with you!
I get you. I feel you.
I have my own insecurities and voices that sound off in my head, not on a daily basis but a few times a week. Just the other morning, instead of waking up saying my usual mantra of “Thank you God, for this day you have made,” I said aloud-and this is the first time in my life I have done this- “I am such a failure.”
Yep. I quickly asked God’s forgiveness on that one. And I also said, “Get the F_ behind me, Satan.” Please don’t think ill of me. I rarely curse.
My insecurities stem from a few things like
- Still sometimes tying my identity to the amount of money I make
- Seeing others in my field doing things I want to do and knowing I could do just as well if not better
- Feeling alone-as a widow, an empty nester, a self-employed coach, and a long-distance fiancee
- The inadequacy of still sometimes feeling like I am not enough to do life with on a daily or even weekly basis, a result of the long-distance relationship choice I didn’t make
On and on it can go.
STOP! Both of us. You and Me. I’m on top of the things I just listed, and you need to be on top of yours, too, reframing and affirming yourself with positive self-talk and love. Got it?
Beautiful woman, we are LOVED by an almighty Creator who made us. As the psalmist wrote, we are perfectly made! Yes, perfectly, even with our wrinkles, flab, health issues, and insecurities, WE are perfectly made. Regardless of what’s been done to you, said to you, or implied, KNOW that you are beautiful, a unique creation of God, and blessed with talents and skills to offer and impact many.
And I love you. I do. It’s taken me years to say that I love everyone, but we are all connected and we must love. God is love. God loves-even though our human minds don’t always grasp this great mystery. WE must love.
And this includes loving ourselves. I’ve had clients who cannot say they love themselves, and this breaks my heart. Jesus said the second greatest commandment is to love your neighbor as yourself.
Yes, love your neighbor as YOURSELF. Love God. Love yourself. Love your neighbor. In that order.
So, ditch your insecurities! Write down 20 things you have ever accomplished. Think out of the box, if you must. Trust me: You can come up with at least 20. Ask 3 people who really love and admire you to tell you WHY they love and admire you. Write a letter to yourself… from God, and give it to a friend to mail to you on a future date.
You are LOVED. You are ENOUGH.
Amy Walton is a certified life coach, Christian life coach, speaker, and writer who lives on a little canal on the Virginia coast, but she coaches women around the country. If she’s not working or in the gym or the woods, she might just be sipping a nice red wine while rocking on her porch. If she can help you get grounded, own your accomplishments, and turn your life around, contact her at http://www.amywaltoncoaching.com